Scared

There's one friend of mine that doesn't know I'm pregnant. I'm worried about telling her. She lives in another state, so it's not that I'm hiding myself from her. I've just been avoiding making the phone call to tell her. She and her husband have been struggling with infertility for 2 years and are getting ready to start IVF to try and have a baby.

I have fertility guilt. Not that this baby was super easy to conceive - it did take almost a year. But I still am dreading telling her we're having a baby. Not because she'd freak out on me or hold it against me. She'd never do something like that. But just because I know telling her is going to be one more little heartbreak on this journey of hers.

There are times I'd gladly trade places with her so that she could have a baby. I've had one, I almost feel like it's not fair that God has given me a 2nd baby to love when my dear friend hasn't been blessed with her first.

Please pray for me to have the strength and grace to be able to tell her as gently as possible. And please, please pray that they're blessed with a healthy pregnancy soon. They'll be amazing parents and she really deserves to be a mom.

An important milestone and other baby excitement

I am 13 weeks pregnant today. That means I've officially survived my first trimester (for the last time ever - thank goodness). Thus begins the "good" trimester of pregnancy, or so they say.

Partly I'm amazed that this has flown by - I swear, it was only yesterday that I was staring at 2 lines on a test and flipping my lid. But it also seems like a lifetime ago.

This baby will be here before we know it. Heck, we'll find out who this baby is before we know it. My doctor has offered to do my big ultrasound a week early since Todd is leaving to go overseas for 6 weeks. That means that in less than 6 weeks, we'll know who is baking in there.

Crap, that means we'll have to come up with a name. Heck, it should be easy since Todd's practically refusing to participate in the discussion at all.

While I'm thinking of it, I'll list a few names I'm considering. I didn't say "we" since Todd's refusing to discuss names yet. HA HA

Boys:

Reid
Parker
Cohen
Landon

Girls:

Reagan
Reese
Lauren
Ava
Paige
Harper
Caroline

Coincidentally, we made our first big purchase for the baby this week. AAFES was running a sale, plus a 15% off code. Combine that with no shipping and no tax and I scored our $300 double stroller for $160 - delivered. It arrived yesterday and I couldn't help but set it up. They even threw in the $25 organizer for free. Score!

It's Joovy Caboose Ultralight. It's a sit and stand style stroller which means that instead of being a full double stroller (and a giant, heavy, monstrosity), it's got 1 full seat for the baby (and will even hold the infant carrier bucket) and a "caboose" for Will. He can either sit in the back or stand on the back. That'll be perfect for him since he'll be nearly 3 1/2 and not wanting to ride in the stroller like a little guy.

Here's a link to the website so you can see it. We got it in the sage green.

http://www.joovy.com/pages/pd_cabooseultralight.php

I'm also very excited that a good friend of mine offered to throw me a baby shower this week. (Thanks, Shannon!!!) I'm really excited about the idea of celebrating this baby with all my mommy friends. And thankfully for them, I will need next to nothing for this baby. Especially if it's a boy. :)